Yesterday I wrote about the intricacies of removing a bra in public. Then there is the other "end" of things: removing panty hose while driving a car. (I thought this particularly appropriate for today, since it's Sunday and many of us are driving to and from church.)
I haven't done it recently as it requires more flexibiity than my poor old body can summon these days. If you are interested, though, here are the steps.
-Set your car for cruise control. (This is crucial.)
-Position your knees so that they are steering the car, leaving your hands free.
-With your right hand, reach under your skirt and tug the right hip and leg of said hose down.
-Repeat this procedure with the left.
-Elevate your ass slightly above the car seat and wiggle the hose the rest of the way down.
-Kick your shoes off, along with the offending panty hose.
-Replace your shoes.
-Resume your normal driving position.
Gem for the day: if your panty hose offend thee, pluck them out.